


The Abyss Game

by destieled_1995, md1995



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Season/Series 10, Angst, Big Brother Dean, Castiel/Dean Winchester Angst, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Dean-Centric, Destiel - Freeform, Episode: s10e10 The Hunter Games, Family Feels, Humor, Implied Castiel/Dean Winchester, Lucifer's Cage, Mark of Cain, Mark of Cain Cure, OTP Feels, POV Dean Winchester, POV Sam Winchester, Protective Sam Winchester, SPN family, Sam Winchester - Freeform, Supernatural - Freeform, spn fanfic, supernatural 10x10
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2015-12-02
Packaged: 2018-04-09 09:01:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4342346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destieled_1995/pseuds/destieled_1995, https://archiveofourown.org/users/md1995/pseuds/md1995
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you" <br/>-Friedrich Nietzsche</p><p>When Lucifer is a possible cure for the Mark, the boys are forced to do things they would never do. An alternate Supernatural season 10</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter I

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys this is our first fanfiction so be kind :)

CHAPTER I

“Behold! The river shall end at the source.” 

Dean couldn’t listen anymore. He had hurt Metatron and He hurt him bad. The next thing he heard was an explosion. Castiel smashed the door open and Sam ran inside, trying to pull him off Metatron. Dean was feeling lost. The Mark took over and he couldn’t think straight. All he wanted was to hurt Metatron, to cause him pain, to make him suffer for all the things he’d done and said.

“Dean! Hey! Stop, stop!” Sam said and pushed Dean aside “You were killing him!” Dean was now scared. He didn’t want his brother to see this. Everything was a blur. Castiel ran towards Metatron and told something to Sam, but Dean couldn’t make it clear because of the rage and the pain he was feeling. Sam was arguing with Cas about something and the next moment Cas was leaving with Metatron. The only thing Dean heard was “You’re gonna get worse…” Even if he didn’t like that son of bitch, Metatron, he knew he was right. Dean was not okay, he was getting worse and he would get much worse if he didn’t do something.

When he finally managed to calm down, he went to the library of the bunker. He was sitting with his hands on his face, contemplating all the things Metatron has said to him. Sam came over with a beer as usual and sat beside him. 

“Hey, you okay?” Sam asked. 

“He said, the river ends at the source.”

Sam frowned “What does this mean?”

“Maybe nothing.” Dean answered “It’s the last thing he said before you guys busted in.” 

Sam looked down and shuffled awkwardly from his sit, “Look, buddy, we had to…”

“Look I know” Dean interrupted “it’s okay. I was gonna kill him.” He looked deep into his brother’s eyes trying to make him understand how much he was regretting his actions.

“We’re gonna figure it out” Sam reassured him. And then he snapped. “Maybe it does mean something!”  
“What do you mean?” Dean looked at him. 

“The thing Metatron said about the source! Maybe it does mean something.”

“Look Sammy, I don’t want to elaborate on the things that psycho sa-“

“No Dean. I mean it!” Sam insisted “Remember when I was studying that stuff of Men of Letters about the Mark? The truth is I may have found something…” 

“Go on.” Dean said but then he heard the bunker’s door open. It was Cas. “Dean, how are you feeling?” 

“I’m fine” Dean answered “Come down. Sam found something about the Mark.”

“What do you mean?” Cas asked frowning. 

“Well, I didn’t find something new, only about the Mark’s origins.” Sam started to explain “As we know Cain was banished by God because he killed his brother and after that he teamed with the only enemy God had. Lucifer. Lucifer gave the Mark to Cain and made him a Knight of Hell. So I guess it all began with Lucifer.” Dean was now looking at his brother wide-eyed beginning to realize. “That’s what Metatron meant! The source he talked about is Lucifer himself.”

Cas looked at Sam questioning what he just said. “So what?“

“What?!” Sam turned to see them and stand up. “Look. What I’m saying is that Lucifer is the first reason that mark exists. He is the pure evil, the “source of the river”. He might be the one who can take Dean out of this misery.”

“So what are you proposing, Sammy?” Dean said and crossed his hands. “Summon the Satan himself in the bunker?” he said jokingly and turned to Cas with a smug face.

“Dean, Sam might be right.” the angel said.

“Wha-?”

“He is right Dean. Lucifer is the one who created the Mark. He‘s the one who can destroy it and save you in the process.” Cas told Dean.

“Thank you, Cas!” Sam said and turned to his brother “Look Dean, I know you don’t like it but it’s a possible solution and I’m willing to risk it if it means that you will be safe. I don’t want to watch you murder everyone and then drink yourself to death. I want to do something. Please trust me.”

Dean was not convinced. He didn’t like the turn of the situation, it was admittedly an awful plan but his brother and the angel were right. They were running out of solutions and the Mark was becoming stronger day by day. “Fine” he said “But we’re going to do a lot of research to be sure. I want no mistakes and no more dead people. Hear me?” 

Sam and Castiel nodded and started organizing the research. Dean looked at them and thought how far they’ve gone because of him. Was it worth it? He didn’t know but he couldn’t think or do anything else. After a while Castiel went to the kitchen and Sam turned to Dean “I say we should call Charlie, she will be a great help.”

“I don’t want her involved in all this mess, Sam. After all where are we going to find her? You know her, she’s like a freaking Jedi.”

“Yeah you’re right” Sam chuckled. “I’ll ring her anyway. You never know.” And left to call her leaving Dean alone. 

Dean didn’t mind it though. Day after day he liked being alone, where no one could lecture him about rights and wrongs. He sat and drunk his beer quietly and began to think about what would happen if they didn’t succeed. What if he would end up dead? Or worst what if Sam or Cas died and he was left alone blaming himself for everything? How would he be able to live like that? Better to be dead yourself than watching the people you care about suffer and die.

His thoughts were interrupted by Cas entering the library. “What were you thinking?” the angel asked him. 

“Nothing.” 

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“I swear if any of you ask if I’m okay one more time, I’m going to kick the hell out of you.” Dean snapped. Castiel frowned and look down and Dean cursed himself. “Look, Cas buddy I’m sorry but-“ 

“It’s okay, Dean.” Cas murmured still looking down. Right away Sam made his way to the table and announced that he was going to sleep “I couldn’t find Charlie so I left her a message.” 

“Okay man. See you tomorrow.” And they went to sleep.


	2. Chapter II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie is here but the boys are still troubled about the cure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the second chapter. We hope you like it :)

It was 4am when Dean heard the bunker door close. "Sam's gone shopping" he thought, "it's time to get up". He looked over the nightstand to check the clock and surprised he noticed that it wasn't even morning yet. "But what was that sound?" He got up from the bed and went to Sam's room only to find his brother sleeping -and snoring he pointed to himself smirking-. Suddenly a loud noise came from upstairs that made Dean freeze instantly. Immediately he grabbed his brother's gun from the nightstand and went out in the corridor. Holding the loaded gun in front of his face, he walked slowly and carefully towards the stairs feeling scared "who is here? How did they find the bunker?" Dean thought about leaving but didn't want to. He just started feeling cozy here with his own room, his own kitchen where he cooked Sammy's dinner. Dean would kill anyone who made him leave the bunker.

He reached the upper floor of the bunker and went straight to the library. What followed was a disaster. Dean caught a shadow moving at his left, he turned and started shooting blindly. He didn't even think. Later, he would blame the Mark. Right after the first shot, someone started to scream but Dean didn't stop. He continued firing the gun against the intruder not caring about killing anyone. Suddenly, Sam who must have heard the noise, appeared from the door behind Dean and yelled "Dean! What are you doing!" Why would he care, Dean though "Dean! Stop! Calm down!!" But he couldn't. Someone was there and was threatening him and his family. He had given himself up to the Mark, not caring about the consequences, because he wanted to feel brave and strong enough to protect what he cares about. He continued shooting when he heard a girly voice "Dean! Stop it's me!!!!" With that he stopped and lowered the gun. He looked over the table and saw a redhead down on her knees covering herself from the bullets.

"Are you alright? Are you hurt?” Sam said but not to Dean. Dean looked at his brother who was running to help a clearly scared Charlie stand up. "I'm fine" she said "But if I knew that you would surprise me like this, I wouldn't have come." she joked. 

They called her, Dean remembered, they were expecting her to come and he nearly killed her. "Charlie. I- I'm so sor-" he stammered trying to apologize.  
"Hey!" she interrupted "don't say it. We'll talk about it later. I'm fine. I just need some sleep." She looked at him with sincere eyes and smiled. Dean tried to smile back but couldn't.  
Suddenly he felt exhausted.

"I think Charlie's right, Dean" Sam said putting a protecting arm around his friend "We all need to calm down a bit" 

"Yeah. I guess." Dean answered looking at his tired brother "Go back to sleep, I'll clean up the mess." 

"Are you sure?" Sam asked 

"Yeah man." Dean answered "Go. It’ s okay" 

"See ya in the morning then. Try not to drink the whole bar" Sam joked and led Charlie to the rooms.

Dean was alone and he would totally drink the whole bar.

**

4 hours and a bottle of whiskey later, Dean decided that it’s time for a shower. After Sam cured Dean from his demon self, Dean started to drink more. It was a way to forget the pain and destruction he brought to his family. But the more he drunk, the more he remembered. He remembered all the terrible, cruel things he did while being a demon. And after, trying to endure the struggles of having the Mark of Cain on his hand, he fell into despair, dragging his brother with him. Oh! What wouldn’t he do to reverse the time. Never call Sam back to search their father nine years ago. But they are family you see. It’s what John taught them. It’s all about the family. 

Still thinking about his problems, Dean exited the bathroom all dressed up, and made his way to the kitchen to make breakfast. Soon Sam and Castiel joined him.

“Are you feeling any better?” Sam asked

“Good morning to you too” Dean answered jokingly and Sam chuckled

“Something happened?” Cas asked concerned

“No. Don’t worry about it.” Dean said and changed the subject “Eat up. We need to wake Charlie so we can start the research”

“Good morning, bitches! What research?” a half-awake Charlie said heading to the table. She sat next to Castiel and looked at him frowning “New addition?” 

“Kiddo this is Castiel, angel of the Lord. Cas this is Charlie.” Dean introduced. Cas raised his hand politely but Charlie was already hugging him tightly “I’m so happy to meet you, Cas! Can I call you ‘Cas’ too? I’ve never met an angel before. You look so human. Don’t you have wings? Or a halo?” she began to babble. Castiel just looked at her confused not knowing how to answer. Finally, Sam came to his rescue “Let’s just say that he’s not an ordinary angel, Charlie. We’ll explain some other time. Right now, our first priority is to cure Dean from the Mark.” 

But Charlie wasn’t aware of the situation so the boys had to explain everything that happened before and after Abaddon’s death and their decision to free Lucifer. When they finished, they cleaned the kitchen and headed to the library. On the way, Dean touched Charlie’s shoulder and stopped her “Hey, I want to apologize about the, uh, incident” he said looking down

“It’s alright, Dean.” She said hugging him “This Mark has a bad influence on you clearly and I can’t look at you like this. I am here to help you guys, dig up information because that’s what I am good at. So stop whining and let me do my job!” she grinned and pushed Dean down the corridor laughing. They arrived at the library and met Sam and Castiel, who were already studying. They sat around the table and Charlie turned on her tablet.

“So what exactly am I searching for?” she looked at the brothers with a cute confused face. Sam chuckled but Dean was serious “Ways to summon Lucifer.”

“Are we sure we want to do that?” she hesitated“I mean it’s Lucifer we’re talking about. THE Lucifer. The bad guy who kinda tried to destroy humanity.” Dean just stared at her, not knowing what to answer but he was satisfied with the fact that he wasn’t the only one who had doubts. 

“It is the only possible way.” Castiel finally answered

“I know” Charlie said trying to hide any more doubts and started the research. They kept searching for hours without talking to each others. The only sounds were the turning pages and the clicking from Charlie’s keyboard. At some point Dean sighed because he was really tired. He hasn’t slept much and he couldn’t search anymore, unlike his nerd friends, he thought. 

“I need a break.” He declared and stood up

“Dean, you can’t go and leave us do your work, man” Sam insisted “This is for you.” 

“Hey, it was your decision to go that way! You said there was no other choice.” Dean snapped

“Hey! Don’t blame me!” Sam said loudly and stood up. It was like watching a tennis ball match. The boys just stood on opposite sides and yelled at each other until Charlie intervened.

“Hey guys! Stop. We’re been searching for hours in vain. We are tired too.” She said pointing at Castiel. “I think we all need a break.” 

“Charlie is right.” Cas agreed “There is no point in continuing. We should rest for a little bit.” 

Sam and Dean looked at each other, clearly regretting their previous words, “Okay?” Charlie asked concerned. “Okay.” The brothers answered in unison “What do you wanna do?”

“Hm, how about a marathon?” Charlie grinned. “Maybe Game of Thrones?” she said jumping up and down.

“What’s Game of Thrones?” Cas asked but his confused look turned into a scared one, when Charlie slowly turned and gave him an intense wide-eyed glare. “That’s it! He needs education and he needs it right now!” she spoke loudly pushing Castiel to sit on the sofa across the television. They boys joined them while Charlie put on Netflix and they started watching.

**

“The Lannisters send their regards” 

“WHAT? NO!” Dean yelled. “Nooo!” he was watching open-mouthed the screen holding his third beer. Charlie was tearing, Cas didn’t exactly knew what he was watching and Sam was laughing out loud. “You knew?” Dean glared at him. 

“Yes, I’ve read the book!” Sam answered laughing 

“Sweet Jesus! This is it. I’m never watching this show again. Let’s go kill that Martin son of a bitch!” Dean declared pausing the episode.

“Oh Dean, you’re a proper fangirl” Sam joked and everybody except Dean started laughing.

“Shut your face!” Dean said and punched his brother on the shoulder. Immediately, Sam grabbed a pillow and threw it on Dean’s face causing the older brother to fall off the couch.

As expected, everybody including Dean, doubled up with laughter. Dean loved moments like this. They reminded him of the family he always wanted. The family he couldn’t have and would never have because of his life. Even with Lisa, he didn’t feel whole because he missed Sam, he missed Cas. God, he even missed his dad. Dean knew he couldn’t claim that kind of life, a house with a fence, with dogs, cats, kids, a lot of dinners and barbeques every 4th of July. The whole package. He couldn’t have it. But right now, looking at his friends laughing and having a good time, he really wished he could.

However, they weren’t here to have a good time. They were here because of their stupid plan. “We should get back to work.” Dean said suddenly serious.

“Wow, way to ruin the moment, dude” Charlie said and pouted.

“There’s nothing more we can do, Dean. We’ve search for hours and we found nothing.” Sam said to his brother “As much as I want you out of this mess, if we don’t know how to summon Lucifer, there is no reason to keep following this plan.” 

“Well, I’m not so sure about that.” Cas said quietly and all eyes were on him “I’ve thought of something, but it is potentially risky.” 

“Cas, if you have to say something, say it now loud and clear. Please.” Dean told him slightly irritated.

”I think we should consult with Crowley.” Cas said straightforward. 

“Excuse me?"

“What?”

“Who’s Crowley?” 

The three boys looked at Charlie frustrated and she chuckled and mouthed “Sorry”.

“He is the King of Hell, and there is no way he’s helping us, Cas.” Dean said turning his face to the angel. 

“But he could if you go easy on him.” Cas said and continued “Look I don’t want him to interfere either, but he knows the ways and if Crowley is our last chance, so be it.” 

Dean sighed and looked at his brother “Do you agree with this?” but Sam only nodded “Alright, give him a call.” 

Sam picked up his phone and put it on speaker. A manly, a bit unnerving Charlie thought, sarcastic voice answered “Moose, to what do I owe the pleasure?” 

“We need your help.” Sam said but couldn’t continue. A sudden wind started blowing inside the room combined with red smoke. They tried to cover their eyes and protect themselves from the unknown attack when out of the blue they heard…

“Hello boys.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe Crowley's here bitcheees! This chapter was a total bitch so if you liked it, leave a comment or kudos. Thanks a lot xx  
> You can always find us on our tumblr: theabyssgame.tumblr.com


	3. Chapter III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crowley happens

"Hello boys."

"You really know how to make an entrance..." said Sam uncovering his eyes.

"Ain't you happy to see me?" Crowley said smirking at him

Dean just glared to the demon and reached to Charlie asking if she's okay "I thought the bunker was undetectable" she said looking at Crowley.

"Sigils and high protection don't work on me, honey" Crowley said flirting but with one devious look from Dean he cut it off. "Why'd you call me, this time?" he continued.

Dean looked down still contemplating if this is a good idea while Sam begun explaining their plan "Sit down Crowley." 

When he finished, the King of Hell was out of his mind. "Are you two lunatic?" He started yelling "Have you got any idea of what you're talking about? And you" he continued pointing his finger at Castiel "you're totally okay with this? Even if you know what is gonna cause?"

"I don't care if it means to save Dean." Castiel said straightening his body proudly.

Dean looked at him with the corner of his eye and smiled. He knew the angel was on their side and he was grateful. Dean always thought that he should thank Castiel more for what he's done for them. "We didn't call you to judge our plan, Crowley" he said "We intend to open the Cage, but we need your help."

"We don't know how" Sam continued "We studied every possible way, but we can't find the correct objects and after a ,uh, certain incident" he said avoiding the look of his brother "Cas's grace had become weak, so he can't zap himself to search around"

Crowley was listening without saying anything. After a few minutes of just staring at the Winchesters, he sighted and simply said "No."  
Dean frowned confused, but Crowley didn't break "No. I won't do it. Did you actually believe that I, the King of Hell, would risk my position because a bunch of flannel dressed scums and a fallen angel asked for my help?" He chuckled sarcastically "I'm not another Winchester pet" he said and looked where Charlie and Cas were standing.

Dean clenched his jaw and moved towards Crowley "Listen to me, you son of a bitch!" He grabbed the demon's coat with such a force that Crowley almost fell off his chair. Dean made him stood up and yanked him around while Sam was trying to hold him back "You don't get to choose! You put me in this position. You will help us.." he said with a threatening look. Dean knew he should relax, but each interaction with Crowley reminded him of his demon self and made his pulse rise quickly, like he couldn't control himself again.

Sam would swear he caught a mischievous glimpse in his brother's eyes, something that worried him "Dean..."

"No, Moose, let him continue." Crowley said trying to get away from Dean's grab. "Tell me, Dean. What are you gonna do to me? Knife me? Torture me? Throw me in a dungeon and then what?" each word of him came out more loudly "I'm not obliged to help you! You left me. Remember?"

"Oh, what did you except?" Dean said loosening up his grip. He never cared about the demon. Yes, he was helpful while Dean was on his dark side but he never actually needed him. After all, Crowley was the reason had the Mark on his hand, so he didn't care what would happen to him.  
"You thought we were gonna be like bff or something? I didn't need you back then. Not even a bit. But now, unfortunately, I do" he continued catching a look from Sam. "You don't have a choice. You are going to help us because you know how I am if I get angry" he said with a sarcastic smirk and let go off Crowley.

The demon could only look at him a little scared. Dean knew the power he had on him. Crowley contemplated about his options -not that they were many, he thought, he sighted and eventually said "I will need protection. If I'm going to be a part of this deal, Lucifer won't be able to hurt me."

"We can do that." Sam spoke this time. "But you have to find a way immediately."

"I already have a way" Crowley said quietly. Everyone just glared at him when he sat down on the couch. He looked at them like they should thank him for everything good in their lives. Dean hated that look. "Do you remember the four Horsemen?"

"What about them?" Dean said frowning.

"Well, I happen to have in my possession their rings" Crowley said proudly and with a shake of his hand he presented all of them.

Sam and Cas leaned forward to check them "How did you find them?" the angel asked.

"I'm the bloody King of Hell." Crowley pointed with a smug face "I have my ways and my secrets."

Suddenly, Charlie stood up and stormed out of the room clearly annoyed about something. Dean and Sam exchanged a look and Sam nodded at his brother to follow her. When Dean found her, she was at the kitchen drinking water to calm herself. "Charlie, what's wrong?"

"What are we getting ourselves into, Dean? I mean "King of Hell"? Who is he? How is he gonna help exactly? I only feel this will make you worst." she cried looking down.

"There is no worst, kiddo." Dean answered her and she looked at him wide eyed. "I'm in a bad shape. I mean it's worse than ever. I feel like I'm dying on the inside and, and I'm taking everyone with me." he choked "I'm so sorry."

"Oh, Dean." Charlie hugged him and held him tight. "It's okay, we're gonna fix this. I promise." They stayed like this for a while. Dean didn't want to let go. He felt like he was a child again and his mother was holding him. He felt safe. At some time, Sam came into the kitchen and they stopped hugging "Hey guys, is everything okay?" 

"Yeap. Lead the way, Captain Kirk ." Charlie said to Dean and winked.

"Does that make me Spock?" Sam joked.

"No way dude. You're like Mr. Chekov, the tech boy." Dean answered him smirking

"Ha ha you're so funny." Sam said giving him the classic bitch face "Come on, we left an angel and a demon alone long enough"

***

"So how are we gonna do this?" Dean asked once they were all together. When they returned from the kitchen, they all sat around the table at the library with the books Crowley pointed. Not that Dean would ever admit it, but with his help they managed to find the right spell to summon Lucifer.

"It won’t be that hard with me present” Crowley said smugly. ”I’ll write down the right ingredients and your job is to find them." Crowley explained

"I can do that." Castiel stated.

"No, Cas. You're still weak." Dean told him.

"It is alright, Dean. Tomorrow I'll have restored enough of my grace and I will be able to seek for the items." the angel assured him.

"It's settled then. When you'll find them, gimme a call. I have a Hell to run." And with that Crowley disappeared just like the way he appeared. Dean looked at the others and Charlie gave him a reassuring smile. 'I need vacation.' he thought 'Maybe Miami where Sam can go to the beach he always wanted, and Charlie could find a nice girl to date. And Cas can get a tan. He looks a bit pale lately. He might be stressed." Dean noticed.

When Charlie yawned and Sam announced they were going to sleep, Cas turned to Dean "I know what you're thinking and you're wrong."

Dean looked at him raising his eyebrows "No, you don't."

Cas gave him a pointing look saying 'I know you' and said "Everything will be alright. I believe in you." and he went to sleep.

Dean held his marked hand and looked down. If it was another time, he might believe these words, but now all he could do was hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Caught that Star Trek reference ? ;)  
> It's a bit hard to explore Dean's phychology, so forgive us if it is boring! Anyway hope you liked it xx


	4. Chapter IV

The following morning Dean woke up feeling sore and tired, even though he slept quietly and peacefully. He opened his eyes but surprisingly he realized he wasn’t in his room. In fact, he wasn’t even in the bunker. He was in a field. There was green, fresh grass all over him and above him a blue, cloudless sky. It was beautiful. “Dean!” a woman called. Dean turned to look and his mouth dropped open. In front of him stood Mary, his mother, dressed in a white dress with her golden hair loose, she was like an angel. “Am I in Heaven?” he asked looking at her. Speaking of heaven he instantly thought of Castiel. ‘Did he send me here? Where is he? Where is Sam?’ Mary just smiled at him and took his hand. They started walking but Dean heard a loud roar coming from the sky.

All of a sudden everything became dark. Dean blinked. He was standing somewhere high. He was on a hill but he couldn’t see straight. Every time he opened his eyes, he was seeing red dots and his ears were buzzing. He became dizzy. He felt like falling. 

Suddenly he was in his bedroom at the bunker but nobody was with him. He stood and started walking towards the library. Everything was dark except a flickering light in the hall. He was quiet, careful and ready to defend himself even though he didn’t have a gun. He entered the library and heard a muffled sound from behind the couch. He ran and saw a familiar person lying there. “Bobby?” Bobby was gutted and he was dying slowly and painfully. Dean tried to help but the man he could easily call his father was dead before Dean could even lay a hand on him. ‘What’s happening?’ he thought, he was tired and confused, he wanted to know. He decided to go upstairs to check the rest of the place. 

The walls in the corridor were painted with blood and Dean had never been so scared in his life. He kept going until he reached the first room on his left. It was one of the bedrooms he and Sam didn’t use. Someone, a man, was lying on the bed into a pool of blood. Dean didn’t even bother checking on him. He didn’t want to witness that. His eyes started to fill up with tears and his breath was caught in his throat but he didn’t have a choice. He had to find out what happened. 

He went down the corridor where he found the corpse of his brother. “Sam? No!” He ran to his brother and shook him “Sammy! Wake up-“. A terrifying scream heard from the room across the hall interrupted him. He stood and walked quietly towards the sound. He entered the room and what he saw made him freeze in fear. Mary was kneeling on the ground and a man was ready to cut her head off. 

“Let her go!” Dean yelled running towards his mother. 

He tried to grab the man but it was like he wasn’t in the room. Nobody even flinched at the sight of Dean. Neither Mary nor the unknown man turned to look at him. It was like he was invisible. He decided to move to see the attacker’s face. It was him. The man trying to kill Mary was no one but him. “No...” Dean whispered. 

The other Dean was terrifying. His eyes were shining with a murderous glimpse. The Mark of Cain on his hand was swollen and the veins were pumping loudly. It was like Dean could hear the blood running through the veins and his angry feeling coming to the surface. 

“Dean, please… It’s not who you are. You can’t do this.” His mother pleaded but the other Dean didn’t listen. With a quick and sharp move he sliced Mary’s throat. 

“No!!!” Dean cried out loud. 

He tried to hold his mother but he couldn’t react. Invisible ropes were holding him on his place and Dean tried to escape until he heard voices screaming at him “Murderer!”. 

The other Dean turned to him and his eyes turned pitch black and came towards him. Dean tried to scream and fight the forces but he couldn’t. He felt like his vocal cords were ripped out of his throat and he didn’t have any strength left. He tried too hard. He wanted to keep fighting. The other Dean just laughed at him. 

“Don’t you see? It’s pointless. This is your destiny.” And he kept laughing, and laughing and Dean couldn’t take it. He wanted to scream.

“Dean!” Someone was calling him. “Dean-” They were yelling. Dean tried to free himself, to call for help.

“DEAN. Wake up!” 

Dean opened his eyes. It was a dream. His sweat had drenched his clothes. He tried to inhale and exhale normally but couldn’t. Two steady hands were holding him down. “Dean.” Blue eyes were looking right at his. Their color was so calming and his breathing was getting normal again. He looked around the room and it was only him and Cas. “Sam…” he whispered. 

“Dean, are you alright?” Castiel asked him.

“’M fine. Just a nightmare.” He said his voice low. He tried to get off of Castiel’s grab. “Leave me now. I’m okay.” The angel released him and Dean tried to move.

“Can you stand? I can bring you water.” Cas insisted.

“I don’t want water. I need something stronger.” Dean said avoiding his look. He stood up and left the room.

Cas found him some minutes later with a bottle of whiskey in his hand.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

“I’m fine.”

“Do you want to tell me about it? You know I’m always here for you. We’re all here for you.”

“You should leave me alone” answered Dean.

“You can’t shut us out Dean. You need people who care about you. Now more than ever.”

“I said leave me alone. Nothing good happens to people near me” insisted Dean. 

“Don’t say that Dean! Come, tell me about it”.

“Leave Cas!”

Castiel sighed and left the room. Dean just needed some time alone to calm down. He would come around.

Dean kept on drinking. He knew it was just a dream, he knew that, but he couldn’t help thinking that the dream was a glimpse in his future like the Dean in his dream said. They couldn’t cure the Mark and their latest plan was reckless and dangerous. Everyone around him was in pain and he was sure about that. There were moments when he didn’t recognize himself and he was being mean and unfair most of the time even though they were trying to help him. Like some minutes ago he yelled at Cas for no reason at all, he just wanted to know what upset him so much. He didn’t deserve to have in his life. They were trying so hard for him, they were patient and kind and all he did was being pessimistic and miserable. He should leave maybe, but he couldn’t. He knew it was selfish but he needed them. ‘I’ll try to snap less and show them my appreciation some more’ he promised himself ‘but for right now I need to calm down and forget about the dream’. So he kept on drinking.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“I’m here” Sam announced when he got in the bunker. He had gone to get supplies and bring some of the ingredients Cas couldn’t find. “I brought pie!” he said to Dean smiling. 

“Hell yeah. Finally, you remembered” Dean smirked at his brother and went straight to the pie. 

“When are we gonna call Crowley?” Sam asked.

“Now if we’ve got everything we need. I want to get it over with. And call Cas too. I don’t know where he went, but we need him.” 

“Is everything okay between you two? Cas was a bit grumpy before.” 

“Everything’s pitchy.” Dean lied and if Sam figured it out, he didn’t say anything. Instead he called Crowley and told him to be at the cemetery by the afternoon to set things up.  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

When they arrived to the cemetery everything was so quiet. The sky was cloudless and colorful because of the setting sun. It was a hot and beautiful day and every now and then a warm breeze passed through the windows of their car. Dean felt like the world contradicted with his inner self. Everything inside him was frozen and broken. He was anxious about what was going to happen. He worried about everyone and he felt angry all the time. 

Crowley appeared and everyone got out of the Impala. They nodded at each other and started to put the things together for the spell. Sam gave Crowley the ingredients and the demon looked at Dean “Ready?”

“Get on with it.” And Crowley started to pronounce the words in Latin. When he finished, he sighted and stepped back. A few minutes passed and nothing happened. Everyone just stared at the spot where the used ingredients were but nobody talked or moved. At some point Dean rolled his eyes and sighed. 

“That’s it? Where-“ 

Out of the blue, the earth started shaking and a loud groan came from the ground. The ingredients caught on fire and got swallowed by the earth. Dean ran to the car to get his gun and when he returned he saw the earth cracked open and smoke coming from that spot. 

“What’s happening?” he yelled to his brother who tried to keep his balance. Dean searched Castiel with his eyes but suddenly a loud shriek was heard and a bright white light burst. Dean couldn’t see anything. The only thing he heard was someone repeating his name. 

“Dean!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are always welcome!


	5. Chapter V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys we are terribly sorry about the delay but you know... summer vacations ;) let's say we were in hiatus! so here's chapter number 5. hope you like it :) see you next tuesday xx

“Multiple earthquakes were noticed all around the world.”

“Atlanta was hit by a massive rainstorm.”

“The authorities are trying to evacuate the disaster zones.”

“It’s nothing like we’ve ever seen before.”

 

Dean turned off the television. He couldn’t listen anymore, or look at his brother knowing that they’re somehow responsible for this. They had left the cemetery and what followed was a catastrophe. Now he was sitting on the couch beside Castiel with his head in his hands feeling his organs shrinking from the guilt. Sam sighed and stood up “Did we cause this?” he asked.

“You with your brilliant ideas.” Dean answered clearly irritated with the whole situation. 

“Yeah right. Put the blame on me.” Sam said loudly turning to his brother, but before they could argue Castiel placed his hand on Dean’s shoulder mouthing “please”. Dean looked at him and his face softened immediately. There was something about this angel, about his presence that always made Dean feel like he belonged somewhere. After all these years, Dean counted Castiel as family and a righteous partner on their trips, so when the angel looked at him with his big blue eyes, he couldn’t help but smile. He looked at Sam and said “We shouldn’t fight. We must find what happened. I say we go back to the cemetery and start tracking Lucifer down.” 

“You ain’t going anywhere.” 

But it wasn’t one of them that spoke. Instantly everyone stood and turned to the voice’s direction. Dean reached for his gun, held it up and paced forward trying to see the man hiding in the shadows. “What the hell-“

“Dean! Don’t.” Castiel yelled having already recognized the figure. “It’s Chuck.”

The boys turned to look at the angel agape while the prophet came out of his hiding place. He was different than the last time they saw him. His hair had greyed and a beard had started to grow. He looked a little tired but his eyes were that familiar bright and clear blue mirroring the purity of his soul. Chuck looked at the Winchesters probably afraid of their reaction. Seeing him after all this time can be quite a shock, he thought. But his thoughts were vanished when the older brother leaned to hug him.

“It’s good to see you alive man.” Sam said smiling behind them but Chuck broke the hug “What the hell, guys?” he said strictly “Why every time something goes wrong you three happen to be in the middle?” he started pacing the room without looking at them. Dean felt he was yelled at by the principal in a high school.

“I’m trying. I really do.” Chuck continued. “I stopped writing like you asked me to. I hided leaving the Heaven business to you” he pointed at Cas “but you don’t give a rat’s ass about my words, do you? You only do what he says” he looked at Dean.

“Chuck-“

“No. Don’t.” he stopped Sam from talking “You started the freaking Apocalypse. Again.” 

“You have to understand” Castiel began to explain. “We didn’t do it intentionally.”

“Yeah, I know. The Mark of Cain.” 

“How do you know?”

“I’m a prophet, Dean, I know everything. As I know this isn’t going to end well. For anyone.” Chuck wanted to make them understand the consequences of what they’ve done but he knew that the brothers were stubborn enough to do anything to save each other. He sighted and sat on the couch. 

Dean watching the desperate face of the prophet looked at Sam who nodded affirmatively to him. “You are right.” he turned to Chuck “We messed it all up. Hell, it’s what we always do right?” he chuckled “Help us. Help us get this right. I’m sure you know how.” 

Chuck lifted his chin and looked at Dean knowing that he’s sincere “I don’t know how to fix this, Dean. There’s nothing to restrain Lucifer. If he indeed got out of his cage he would want to take revenge. He will come after you.”

“So we need to get him first.” Sam declared.

“Easy peasy.” Dean mocked and Sam gave him his classic bitch face. Castiel shuffled in his position looking thoughtful. Dean caught a glance of him with the corner of his eye wondering about his friend. He could almost hear the gears of the angel’s mind rotating, trying to find the answer to all this. Dean couldn’t help but think about what Chuck had said earlier to Cas “you only do what he says”. It was true, the angel had blind faith in him and trusted him, body and soul. Dean wasn’t sure he could live with this. He couldn’t understand why Castiel still believed in him. Dean has changed; he’s far from what he was when they first met. He’s not the righteous man anymore.

He kept thinking that when Castiel finally spoke “We can find him. Chuck and I.”

Everyone turned to look at him and before the brothers could argue, he said “What I’m saying isn’t absurd. We need to understand what’s happening and we have to trace Lucifer. Sam, you can’t be out there because he might be able to discover you. You’re safer inside the bunker.”

“I highly doubt it with everyone coming and going anytime they want.” Sam joked looking at Chuck. Dean snorted at the joke but Cas continued “We can do it. I still have my powers, or a part of them, and Chuck is… Chuck.” 

Dean raised his brows at that but didn’t argue. He couldn’t think of something else, so he agreed. “Okay. But anything happens, you call. Got it?” he said to Cas who nodded.  
“We’re leaving now. We’re wasting no more time.” Chuck declared. He stood up to follow Castiel when he caught a worried look on Dean’s face. “He’ll be okay. I’ll keep an eye on him” he whispered to the oldest Winchester. 

“Be careful and call me whatever happens.” Dean answered him and they departed.

**** 

The sky was dark and the moon was high when Cas texted Dean that he and Chuck were fine somewhere in Indiana. They would keep going until they found traces of Lucifer. Dean and Sam were sitting at the library, Sam studying something Dean didn’t quite understand, “a total nerd” he thought. After a while, Dean felt his eyes getting heavy and he almost fell asleep on the table “Hey man, go to sleep” Sam finally said.

“But the others-“

“I’ll inform you if anything emerges. Now go to sleep, I’m sick of seeing your lazy ass taking space in the library for no reason” he waved him off jokingly. 

“What a kind brother.” Dean murmured on his way to the bedroom and Sam chuckled. Sam was now alone with his book. He didn’t complain though, he liked reading and studying. That’s why he applied to Law. He liked his life there. He studied for something he wanted, something common that wasn’t about monsters for once. For a sort time, he got a life different than the life he was destined for. He was happy. But after John died, he finally understood what family truly meant to him. He had to be there for Dean. He had to protect him whatever the cost. So what if his life was about hunting monsters or studying about biblical creatures? It was the best life as long as he was with his brother.  
His thoughts were interrupted when all of a sudden a noise was heard. “Dean?” Sam asked. The lights started flickering and the earth was quaking ‘that definitely wasn’t Dean’ he thought. Immediately, he went for his gun on the table but suddenly a high force pushed him off his chair towards the wall. His vision blurred and a human form came closer to him “Miss me?”

‘No. No way’ Sam thought. 

He looked at the man above him wide eyed. He searched with his eyes for his gun but it was thrown away from him. Then he tried to stand and maybe run but the man forced him down “oh no Sammy. Don’t ruin all the fun. We used to be such good friends” the man said.

“What do you want, Lucifer?” Sam said whispering. His head and side were aching and he couldn’t breathe normally to speak loud enough for Dean to hear him. 

“Oh, nothing… just you.” Lucifer declared looking deep into Sam’s eyes. 

“I’m not gonna say yes.” 

“Oh you will. In order to save your precious brother, you’ll do whatever I ask.” Lucifer spoke and then started laughing. It was a high pitched laughter that pierced Sam’s ears like a siren. He covered his ears but the noise became even higher. Glasses were breaking and Dean was nowhere so he started screaming so loud he thought his throat was going to explode.

And then, he woke up. He had fallen asleep on his chair while reading. Sweat ran all over his face and body and he was out of breath. ‘Breath in – Breath out. It was just a nightmare’ he tried to convince himself. But he knew. He knew the dream was not just his imagination. Lucifer was here. Lucifer had found him and he wanted him.


	6. Chapter VI

“Dean, they found him.” 

The sun started to rise, two days after Castiel and Chuck had departed, when Sam busted in his brother’s room. After many pokes Sam managed to wake him up to tell him the news.

“Cas called me and-“

“You?” Dean interrupted him, rubbing his eyes.

“Yeah, he called me, why?” Sam frowned.

“Uh, nothing.” The angel used to call him instead of Sam if something came up. What changed now, he thought. Not wanting to annoy his brother, Dean pushed these thought on the back of his mind and gestured for him to continue. “Never mind, go on.”

“Well, uh, as I said Cas called and told me that they found something huge at Austin and that we are needed there. He said that they might have found him but they require our help.”

“So, we’re leaving now?” Dean said and got out of his bed. 

“Yeah, I told him that we will leave in a few hours so we can be there by tomorrow afternoon. You okay with that?”

“Yes sure” Dean shrugged “Let me pack and we’re out.”

With that, Sam left to pack his own staff. He hasn’t said anything to Dean about his dream yet because he didn’t want to upset him more. Dean was already concerned about their friends going away and risking their lives for him. He actually hasn’t done anything but drink and sulk until he received a text from Castiel. Sam literally forced him to eat the previous night. He really hoped this operation would work, for the sake of all. 

*** 

It was 8 o’clock when the brothers locked the bunker and drove off. Inside the Impala, rock music filled the air and Dean murmured Lynyrd Skynyrd lyrics while driving. Three tapes later, Sam has fallen asleep; ‘Such a baby’ Dean thought. He kinda missed all the road trips with his little brother. He wanted to go back to normal when they hunted simple monsters, ghosts and vampires. All the Heaven and Hell business really started to get on his nerve. 

Two hours before they got to their destination, Sam woke up. 

“Where are we?” Sam yawned

“Wakey wakey! Just got into Texas. Fort Worth.” Dean announced. “You should text Cas.” 

“Yeah, I will.” 

“Mhm.” Dean nodded.

“Is something wrong?” Sam said texting.

“No.” Dean declared turning to his brother. Sam narrowed his eyes clearly not believing him but didn’t say anything right away. Dean turned his eyes to the road again and thought about the angel. When Castiel left with Chuck, he didn’t even say goodbye and now it’s crystal clear that he didn’t want to talk to Dean. ‘That was it huh’ Dean thought. This Mark had changed him so much that even his friends averted from him. 

“Dean, you know Cas’s trying to help you right?” Sam broke the silence but Dean didn’t answer. “We all do” he continued.

“What happens if he says no?” Dean asked.

“Who?”

“Lucifer.” Dean simply said still looking straight ahead at the road.

“Oh.” Sam looked down

“Yes. ‘Oh’.” Dean mocked “You haven’t thought of that, have you? You’re all thinking that this is easy. That we will find Satan and he will kneel and do whatever we say like a puppet. What if he says no, Sam? What if none of your brilliant plans work?” he was rambling but he didn’t care. They all thought they were helping him when they didn’t actually have the slightest idea of the worst scenario. 

“It will work, Dean.” Sam said quietly.

“How do you fucking know?” Dean now felt anger and frustration rising. “You’re not sure. None of you is sure. You’re hoping!” he yelled “Hope is not gonna save me. Nothing is gonna save me. Why can’t you get it?”

“Because Lucifer told me!” Sam yelled back. Dean turned to look at his brother frowning. “Lucifer came into my dreams. He found me.” 

“What do—“

“He told me to be his vessel. He told me that if I want to save my brother I have to say yes” he explained to Dean with teary eyes.

“You aren’t seriously thinking about doing that.” Dean turned to look at his younger brother and by the look he received he understood “No. No fucking way. No.” he said straight out.

“Dean if this is the way-“ Sam tried to say.

“I said no.” Dean was now really trying not to lose his temper. “I ain’t gonna let you do this.” 

“Why do we even argue?” Sam sighted “I haven’t made the decision yet.”

“And you won’t. Ever. I won’t let you. You’re my little brother. It’s my job to take care of you.” Dean declared. Sam didn’t continue. He knew that this conversation was a dead end. Dean would never agree, but it was his deal. It was something that Sam had to do. 

They kept driving, not talking to each other. The atmosphere inside the car was electrified and Dean felt he needed some air, so they stopped at the first diner outside Austin, Texas. They decided to call Cas who told them that he was currently at a motel near them, so they ate in silence and departed again. 

When they parked outside the room, before Dean could get out of the car, Sam stopped him. “Hey, I know what I said is difficult to understand-“ Dean opened his mouth to argue but Sam raised his hand “Let me finish. I never said that I’ve already decided, but you have to understand what I’m saying. I want to help you. We all do but you have to let us, man.” 

“Not if this means getting you killed.”

“Nobody is gonna die, Dean.” Sam assured him. Dean wasn’t convinced but he hugged his brother tightly.

“I thought you hated chick flick moments.” Sam laughed.

“Shut up.” He said breaking the hug.

“Jerk.”

“Bitch.”

 ***

“Where are they anyway?” Chuck asked Cas huffing. 

“We’re here ladies. Stop whining.” A voice was heard behind the room’s door. Cas rolled his eyes and opened the door to the Winchesters. 

“Hello Dean” he said half smiling.

“Hey Cas” Dean said entering the room. “What do you got?” 

“Well we searched a lot and we had to interrogate some demons to get here. I hope Crowley won’t mind.” Chuck joked and the Winchesters chuckled. “All the tracks led here so we decided to give it a shot.” 

“It turns that here were noticed huge climate changes the last week and some people were found killed under strange circumstances.” Cas continued.

“You thought it’s Lucifer trying to find a vessel.” Sam said. 

“Yes. We we-“ 

But Cas never got the chance to finish because a loud shriek was heard. Cars sirens activated and the shriek continued. It was very loud and second by second the noise became more intense. Everyone but Chuck tried to cover their ears. He only stood straight looking forward when all of sudden he vanished. Cas looked at Dean who tried to catch Sam because he was screaming in pain.

“What is happening?” Dean demanded yelling but before Cas got the chance to answer him the windows and every glass in the room started breaking in million pieces that came towards them. After a minute, everything quieted. Dean grabbed Sam from the floor but the door suddenly flew open.

“Hola!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SAM IS SUCH A SWEETHEART GUYS I CAN'T


	7. Chapter VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Cas is not very active in this chapter sorry!! Hope you like it xx

“Hola.” 

No one could speak. Everyone just couldn’t speak. The Lord of Hell, the Fallen Angel, Lucifer was standing right in front of them in the middle of the room. He wasn’t like the man in Sam’s dreams; his face was bruised and burned, like the human body he was possessing couldn’t hold him. He stood tall and firm, not hiding underneath the shadows of the room. His power lightened up the room, as you could almost see his grace glowing in the dark. He turned to look at their terrified faces and smirked.

“You above all should have known not to mess with that kind of games, kiddos” he told them with a steady voice. No one made a move; it was like they were hypnotized by his presence. Dean had Sam in his arms, who was still pretty much unconscious and only reacted when Cas shuffled beside him. 

“What’s wrong with Sam?” he demanded.

“Oh he will be fine. You’re overreacting” Lucifer responded.

“Sam is fine, Dean. His brain is just weak because of Lucifer’s power. Being his true vessel somehow connects his soul with him” he explained gesturing at the Devil in front of him. He turned to see Dean who looked at him worried “He is going to wake up soon” he reassured him. Dean nodded and looked at his little brother. He lifted him and put him on the bed and turned to Lucifer. 

“I know what you are trying to do to him. It’s not gonna work.” 

“Let me be the judge of that.” Lucifer said smugly raising his eyebrows. Dean clenched his jaw but didn’t answer. “So… not that I don’t appreciate the gesture, but why did you free me?” 

“Metatron said-“ Dean begun but was interrupted when Lucifer let out a chuckle. 

“Metatron?”

“Yes. He is in Heaven’s jail right now but he said that you can remove the Mark of Cain from my arm and-“ 

“The Mark of Cain?” Lucifer interrupted again frowning. 

“Will you let him finish?” Cas said slightly irritated.

“Didn’t I kill you?” Lucifer mocked pointing at the angel who suddenly couldn’t get his voice out. He ran his hands on his throat not able to do something else. Dean immediately moved towards Lucifer who just pinned him on the wall. “Now would you two behave please? I need answers.”

***

When Sam opened his eyes, his mouth was dry, his ears were still ringing but he could hear someone talking. Unable to articulate a word, he shuffled and let out a moan. “Well look who decided to wake up” he heard someone talking but the voice wasn’t familiar. 

“What-“ he whispered. 

“Sam!” Dean said loudly. With that Sam turned around to see Dean. He was pinned against the wall. “No don’t move. It’s fine, I’m fine.” 

“Yeah, Sammy. We’re just talking.” Lucifer said letting Dean go.

“What happened?” Sam said rushing to his brother who landed on the floor with his face. “Are you alright?”

“He just explained to me your plan.” Lucifer answered instead of Dean. “He and his puppy” he continued gesturing at the muted angel “told me that it was your idea. It was a good one, Sammy. I didn’t think you missed me that much” he said smirking. “Anyway, I don’t see how this plan could harm me. I mean you’ve already set me free so…” he kept pacing in the room while Sam was trying to make Dean stand on his feet. “I accept.”

Sam narrowed his eyes “But…?” 

“Why you presume that there’s a ‘but’?” Lucifer stopped pacing and looked at his true vessel crossing his arms.

“Because it’s too simple.” Sam said and took a step forward leaving Dean to Cas. “It’s never that easy with you.”

Lucifer paced forward too and now they were standing only a few inches apart. “Oh you know me so well, Sammy” he smirked

“Stop calling me that.” Sam hissed.

“Easy boy” Lucifer said raising his hands in defense playfully while Dean was thinking three hundred possible ways to kill the Devil. He had managed to slip away from Castiel’s grip and stood beside his brother eyes focused on Lucifer. 

“Listen to me you rotten son of a bitch” he said “you either help or we‘ll send you back to your Hell. I don’t mind.”

Lucifer narrowed his eyes and backed off “I said I will help you. But I have a few conditions.”  
Sam huffed and turned his back to their enemy. “I’m not going back to the cage.”   
Cas tried to intervene but Dean stopped him giving him a look. “When we finish this, you’re gonna leave this Hell business behind, and let me do my job” he continued.

“What about Crowley?” Dean asked.

“I’ll take care of him.” Lucifer answered. Silence fell as Dean was processing the demand ‘There nothing wrong with getting Crowley out of our way’ he thought. He was ready to agree and set the deal when suddenly Sam turned around and whispered “Dean, there’s more.” Dean frowned but didn’t say anything.

“I want Sam.” Lucifer announced quietly.

The color drained from Dean’s face. He felt his stomach sinking like every happy feeling was lost from this world. The only thing he could feel was fear, despair, anger. ‘Why?’ this question played over and over again inside his mind ‘why again’. He marched towards Lucifer and grabbed him from the collar of his shirt.

“That’s never gonna happen!” he hissed.

“Dean-“ Sam tried to say taking a step forward. 

“Shut up Sammy!” Dean interrupted him never loosening up his grip.

“No, Dean.” Dean could hear his brother’s voice cracking “No. That’s my decision not yours!” He let Lucifer and slowly turned around to see his brother. 

“Sam, listen to me-“ 

“No, Dean. You listen to me. I’m tired. I really am. I’m tired of you always looking out for me. I’m tired of you always saving me. I’m tired of you always getting hurt only to protect me. You keep forgiving me, and-and loving me when all I ever do is letting you down.” Sam’s voice was hoarse and his eyes teary. “I keep letting you down. And you always forgive me. Because you’re my big brother. That’s your job.” He let out a sad smile and sighted. 

“It won’t ever stop, Sam.” Dean said taking a step to hug his brother. 

“No.” Sam said avoiding him.

“Sam-“

“No!” Sam yelled crying “Don’t you see? It’s the only way to save you! It’s-“ he took a deep breath “It’s the only thing I can do to get this finally right! I have to, Dean! For once in your life let me do something to save you. Help me to get this right. Please. I don’t want to let you down. Not again!”

“Sam you’re not-“

But Sam wasn’t listening anymore. He pushed his brother away to reach Lucifer. He was determined to be the lamb on the altar. It was like everything happened in slow motion. Dean ran to catch his brother when he felt two strong arms gripping him from behind. He resisted with all his power but the sentiment was like an anchor dragging him on the floor. He started yelling and screaming until he was out of breath, tears running from his eyes “Sam!!” 

But Sam never came back. His little brother looked at him with a smile, hope written in his face and nodded. He turned to look at Lucifer and quietly said that one word that made Dean let out a muffled cry.

“Yes.”


	8. Chapter VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry about the delay but we have a surprise for you :)  
> *drum roll*  
> Tomorrow we will post an extra chapter because we missed one last week and this one is a bit small! Hope you like it though xx

Sam was feeling dizzy. His eyelids were weak and he felt his kneels giving up a long time ago. Not knowing where he was he tried to move but his feet didn't move. He was floating.It was like his inner self was separated from his body. His head spinning aroung like he was on a roller coaster, like the one Dean had taken him when they were kids. 'Dean' he thought 'Where's Dean?' But his mind was too numb to follow. He just couldn't move. Like he was restrained with a million of invisible ropes. Suddenly a shooting pain spreaded on his chest, like someone was stabbing him again and again. He felt his internal organs freezing from the sudden attack.He felt his body burning. He felt exhausted. He felt awaken. He felt pain. He felt peace. Sam couldn't understand. It was hell all over again.Just like he always remembered. Just like his nightmares. He tried to scream for help but all that came from his mouth was a pathetic whine. He felt powerless. He wondered if this was death; if this wasthe ending of his human life. But it didn't felt like an ending. It felt like a beggining. The beggining of a neverending nightmare; his body and mind given up on Lucifer. His senses surrendering day by day to him until Sam would be finally dead. Everyday in his life since the Apocalypse, Sam thought about this day.The day of his final death. He always thought that it would be him, him killing himself. Because he couldn't stand what he had done. The pain he caused to Dean,his father. His mother died because of him. Jessica died because of him. Apocalypse started because of him. He was a failure. He was an abomination. He deserved to die. He deserved the pain, the suffering. He deserved everything that would happen to him from now on. It was his doom and his saving at the same time.It was his punishment and his redemption. He did something to save his brother; to make Dean look up to him at last. Everything from now on was for Dean. To save that man who denied his personal life to raise him. His brother, his fatherl-figure, his idol, his hero. The pain in his chest increased and Sam felt his bones cracking; his efforts to breath were tiring and painful. He was suffocating. Everytime he tried to open his eyes he could feel them drying and burning up. His body and mind were slowly giving up to the pain. To his death. There was no light. No tunnel. No life flashing before his eyes. There was only agony, sickness and misery. But deep inside his torn heart Sam felt hope. Dean would okay after this. Everything will be fixed.'For Dean' he whispered behind his dried and chapped lips and let the dark veil take him. 

***

Dean saw his brother walk towards Lucifer knowing what was about to happen. He tried to run for him but Castiel wouldn't let him 'No!' he screamed again and again trying to get away from the angel's manhandle. "Sam! No!!" He watched as Lucifer touched Sam's forehead with two fingers. Sam let out a loud shriek and fell to the floor unconcious. Dean never in his entire life felt so powerless and useless. All he could do was cry and scream and yelp watching his little brother die in front him.

"Cas, let me go God damnit!! Let me go!!!" he screamed but the angel didn't obey. On the contrary, he tightened his grasp, squeezing dean on his chest, never letting him go. Not because he wanted Sam to die. No, never. He grew very fond of the young Winchester over the years. But he understood. He was aware of what Sam's said about death salvation and sacrifice. Cas would give his life too if it meant for Dean to live. And he knew what were the consequences if Dean wasn't restrained right now. 

Meanwhile, Lucifer, never letting his eyes of his true vessel, began to murmur some kind of spell because all of the sudden dark smoke came out of his mouth, and his ears, and his eyes. The smoke went through Sam's chest, leaving the body Lucifer used to possess drop dead on the floor. And then nothing happened. No move, no sound.

Dean was staring at the lifeless body of his baby brother. He couldn't breath, couldn't move. The only thing he felt was the hot tears streaming down on his cheeks leaving a salt taste on his lips. His brother was dead. The boy he swore to protect was lying in front of him and Dean did nothing to avert the situation. It was his fucking job "Keep your eyes on Sam" dad had said "It's your responsibility now" he said. And in the end, in the hour of need, Dean didn't do it. He betrayed his promise. 

"Dean..." he heard Cas's whisper beside his ear sending shivers on his spine. The voice was harsh like Cas was about to cry. But Dean didn't stand. He was uncapable. He was defeated. His life-mission was to guard Sam and he failed. 'Failed' the word repeated pn his head 'failed- failed- failed'. Dean let out a loud sob and turned his face from his brother's corpse. Clinging on Cas's shoulder he broke down and Cas held him and maybe he shed a tear too, for now on, Sam Winchester was dead.


	9. Chapter IX

'Sam is dead" Dean thought 'My Sammy. Is dead.' But he wasn't really, was he? Lucifer got inside him. He possessed him. So Sam wasn't dead. Dean hoped. He stopped sobbing but he was still inside Castiel's arms. He felt warm; his head resting on the Angel's shoulder, his hands between their chests feeling Cas's heartbeat. Following the drumming sound he could feel his breathing stabilizing. He almost felt calm and safe inside those arms. But how could he feel safe when his brother was lying dead ten inches away. He slowly backed away from Cas not daring to make eye contact. "Is he dead?" he whispered looking at Sam's body.

"If you mean physically, no. Lucifer has possessed his body so any time now he should rise. But mentally, yes. Sam's no longer with us." Cas explained standing up. "I'm so sorry, Dean."

"It's okay." he lied. He somehow made his knees move and slid across the room to Sam. He studied his brother's face closely. He looked peaceful like he was sleeping. It seemed surreal to Dean not being able to push him just to wake him up; to turn up the volume of the radio just to see Sam's bitchy face when he would wake up all pissed off. Sam would never wake up again. Not as himself anyway. Dean stroked a strand of hair off his face and cupped his cheek "Sammy..." he let out a bare whisper "Forgive me." he continued devastated and bent down to hug his brother's body. 

After what seemed hours, Dean stood up and walked towards his best friend. He didn't even make it halfway when a loud gasp was heard. A bright light appeared and Dean turned around to see Sam standing in front of him with a curious look on his face. 'Well, not Sam' he thought. 

Lucifer, in his true vessel now, looked at them and smirked smugly "Oh ho! Look at me!" he laughed and made a round like a model "Aren't I just gorgeous?" 

Dean clenched his jaw but didn't speak a word. Instead, he shuffled and let Cas do the work. The angel made a step forward and gave a threatening look at the devil "Do as you promised." he ordered.

"I will. You should know I'm not as greedy as they present me. I'm quite humble." Lucifer continued joking. 

Dean couldn't stand this. "Enough of this crap!" he hissed "Just do it" he said folding the sleeve of his shirt revealing his marked hand. As he caught a glimpse of it, he remembered why he loathed it so much. Not just because of the monster it has transformed him into but also for the pain it caused to his loved ones. He couldn't bear it any longer; He was sure of what he was going to do.  
He gave Cas a certain look and the angel nodded approvingly. 

Lucifer moved towards Dean with Cas following him. It was weird to see Sam only a few inches away from him, knowing it wasn’t his brother any more, Dean thought. He kept away those thoughts and let Lucifer touch his arm. He felt a sting and immediately tried to back away from him. However Cas gave him a reassuring look that made him stay put on his place. Lucifer started mumbling some unknown words that Dean thought might be Enochian, when suddenly a bright white light busted in the motel room.

"Is this part of the plan?" Dean asked Cas.

"No." Cas said flatly turning to see throught the broken windows "I can't detect the source of the light, Dean. But I know it’s something powerful. I can feel it."

"You are right." Lucifer said suddenly severe. If Dean was paying attention to him he would see that he had stopped the procedure and was staring outside narrowing his eyes.

"Fucking Hell! What is it now?" Dean said infuriated but before he could get an answer the light became lighter and white beams of light emerged inside the room illuminating every corner. And then they were under attack; white smokey things came toward them like comets knocking him and Cas off to the walls. Lucifer stood alert and shot back some black smokey kind of balls. The black and white lights swirled together creating a vertigo around the room. Dean stood up and went to help Castiel when a sparkle from the lights hit the angel right on his chest. With a shriek, Cas fell down on the floor. Dean ran to him in agony; he can't let his friend die. Not him too, he thought. 

"Cas! I'm here buddy, hold on!" he screamed despite the chaos that spinned around the room, trying to cover Castiel's aching body from the firing. 

Lucifer kept fighting, moving his hands around, directing the dark smokes. If he wasn't threatened or in danger, Dean would say that it was a beautiful sight. The lights battling with the shadows; the good against the evil. Even though good and evil have lost their meaning in Dean's world. 

All of a sudden Lucifer was fuming and his eyes turned red; he was furious. Dean didn't want to witness the effusion of his rage, so he grabbed Cas from his waist and lifted him on his shoulder not caring about the weight. He managed to go to the door -which had been broken by the previous invasion of the devil- and ran as fast as he could towards his car. 

With a sigh, he laid Cas on the backseat, making sure he was in a comfortable position even though Cas didn't protest about anything. He got in the car and set off, leaving the echoes of the battle in the motel behind them.

He was driving for forty minutes when he heard Cas's whimper. He looked at him through the mirror "Are you alright?"

"Yes" muttered Castiel.

"You're a pathetic liar, you know that?" Dean half joked and pulled aside the car. He got off and helped Cas out. "Wait here." He continued and pushed him lightly on the front sit. He opened the trank to bring the first aid-kit Sam always carried with him. He kneeled in front of his friend and started unbuttoning his shirt.

"Dean" Cas started to protest only to be cut off by Dean's pointed look. He shuffled and took off his shirt only to reveal a large bloody burn spread on his chest.

"Damnit, Cas! I thought your mojo could take care of these things." Dean winced.

"I'm sorry" Cas frowned. Dean looked at him in the eyes and knew that Castiel wasn't sorry just about the wound. He was sorry about Sam, about the danger he brought in, about everything. After all these years, he could read Cas's mind with just one look; there was a quiet understanding between them that Dean couldn't explain. He didn't speak and began to quietly clean the wound as well as he could. They continued like this until the wound was bandaged "You'll live" Dean joked. 

He picked up the kit and stood to go to the trank. "You son of a bitch-"

"Dean?" Cas turned to him scared but Dean wasn't alone "Chuck?"

"You guys alright?"

"Instead of asking you should have been there and not flying off to God knows where" Dean growled to him.

"I'm sorry!" Chuck said taking a step back "But I knew what was gonna happen. I'm a prophet you know"

"Keep talking and you'll be a dead one!" Dean moved forward but Cas stopped him.

"Michael came huh?"

"What?" Dean asked not quite understanding.

"Lucifer and Michael. They were there, in the motel." Chuck tried to explain.

"No, you moron. Lucifer was there and then some  damn white fireworks came and-"

"Dean. Chuck is right. The white lights were Michael's grace. That's why I'm not fully cured. It was angelic power." Cas explained still looking at the prophet who was now calmer. 

Dean took a step back; he pinched the bridge on his nose and took a deep breath thinking."So he's out too?" He demanded although he already knew the answer.

"Yes. And if we don't stop them, the world will be destroyed." Chuck said flatly.

"Apocalypse again, huh?" Dean sighed and rubbed his neck.

"Dean, we can do this." Cas tried to sound calm but he really was not and Dean knew it.

"How Cas? I don't mean to scare you but we are a minority here. We are not the same as before. Everyone is gone." He said pointedly on the verge of tears "Bobby is dead, Helen is dead, Jo is dead, Sam is-" he choked. "And I am not in the best shape, if you know what I mean."

"We have humanity, Dean." Cas said reassuringly "We have each other and we can do this."

"Cas.."

"Stop. We can and we will." Cas sounded serious and ready which gave Dean strength despite the whole ugly situation. The angel made his way to the left side of the Impala and opening the door he said smugly "Besides, I have an idea."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh come ooon it's not even the first time we leave you with a cliffhanger ;) hope you liked it. See you next week xx


	10. Chapter X

“That’s your plan?” Dean said in disbelief “That’s your brilliant plan?” 

They were driving to the bunker, Cas on his right and Chuck on the backseat. Castiel told Dean about the plan he had thought of. He was thinking about summoning Death; he could give them a clue about how to get rid of Michael and Lucifer. 

“Dean, it could work. Death has great powers beyond Michael or Lucifer. He can help us.” Cas insisted.

“At what price, Cas? I’ve already lost Sam. Don’t make me lose more” he said while driving.

“Is there anything more to lose?” Cas huffed looking down. Dean gave him a puzzled look. Of course there were other things to lose, he thought but didn’t say anything. Cas lifted his head and made eye contact with him and in that moment Dean knew; he knew that the angel understood. He shuffled in his seat and turned his eyesight to the road again.

“What do you think, Chuck?”

Chuck turned to Dean and looked at him through the front mirror. “I don’t know, Dean. It could be helpful and yet, it could not be. I don’t know what to think right now.”

“Well, that was enlightening. Thanks man.” Said Dean full of irony.

“Hey it isn’t my fault you Winchesters always sacrifice yourselves for each other, not caring about consequences!” Chuck talked back “You know we are not obliged to follow you.”

“Then don’t!’

“Dean…” Cas intervened.

“No! Let him be, boy. I’ll leave.” Chuck declared and with a sound of the wind Chuck had disappeared. Dean looked at the empty backseat and frowned.

“Well done!” Cas sighed.

“Why the hell did he call you ‘boy’?” Dean asked perplexed by Chuck’s words.

****

“Are you sure you wanna do this?” 

Cas asked while sitting on a library table inside the bunker. Chuck hasn’t shown any sign of life for three days, but Cas didn’t let himself worry for he should have faith in him. Dean was sitting across him with his feet on the table and beer in his hands. By the time they finally reached the bunker, Dean had locked himself in his room not talking, not eating. Today was the first day he got out, only after Cas promised him a double burger and a six-pack. He entered the library with the same clothes he wore at that motel, unshaved and unclean but Cas didn’t comment on it. They sat and ate in silence, the absence of a third man bold inside the room. When they finished and Dean opened his third beer, he looked at Cas and told him that he agreed to the plan.

“Don’t tell me you wanna back off now. You’re the one who proposed it anyway.” Dean said taking a sip of his drink. 

“I just want to be sure you are positive about this.” Castiel said.

“I am not.” Dean declared giving a fake smile “But I turned my mind all over our case the last few days and there aren’t any other possible options.” Cas narrowed his eyes in disbelief. “Okay, I’m not fine, hell I’m a million miles away from fine, but there’s nothing we can do right now except that.”

Cas didn’t say anything for a while, he just stared at Dean with a brooding expression. “If we are going to summon Death we have to be extremely cautious.”

“Lucky to have you here then, huh?” Dean answered with a weak smile. Castiel smiled back and moved to clean their table but Dean stopped him “I’ll do it. You go find what we need, okay?” Cas nodded and departed leaving Dean alone doing the chores. At least it was a distraction.

*****

After they gathered what was needed to cast the summoning spell, they decided they would do it outside. Dean didn’t want Death inside his house. Call it superstition, call it whatever you like but he wanted something new. A fresh start, without misery and deaths. He wanted this to be finally over. 

They got in the car and drove off to the nearest forest in Kansas. It was dark so nobody would see them cast the spell and assume that they are some kind of Satanists or whatever. When they arrived, they set down the things and started the process. Dean took a deep breath to cast out the fear and the stress he felt, cut his hand and spelled the Latin words making sure to get them right. 

“Well, I would say that this is a surprise but I’d be lying.”

Dean and Cas both turned around to see Death waiting for them. He was serious and looked quite annoyed. “Uh” Dean stammered.

“I can’t bring your brother back. I would say I’m sorry but I’m not. You two should have died years ago. Good night, gentlemen.” Death said flatly and prepared to vanish.

“Woah wait a minute.” Dean yelled and managed to grab his shoulder harshly. When he understood what he did, he quickly regretted it. “Sorry” he said letting him go “but that is not what we want.”

“We want you to kill Michael and Lucifer.” Cas declared and Dean rolled his eyes at the lack of subtlety from Cas. 

“Excuse me?” 

Dean cleared his throat catching Death’s attention “Um, we want you to get rid of the duo BelCanto” he said jokingly only to receive a glare from the reaper. “You once said that you have the power to kill the god himself. You can do that, right?’

“Yes but I won’t interfere in their business. More fighting for them, more dead for me.” 

“Yes but the world will end and there would be no souls to guide. In fact, you’ll be out of business.” Dean pressed him, and he was succeeding because Death was thinking without talking. 

“All right.” He finally said making Cas exhale, relaxed.

“Now that we sorted this out, we need another favor.” Death tilted his head questioning what Dean had said. “Can you remove this Mark?” he said lifting his arm. Death’s face froze for a moment but didn’t say anything so Dean continued “We-we tried anything, hell my brother died for it!” he spoke looking down.

There was silence. No sound but the wind that howled around the trees. For an instant Dean thought that Death had flew away but lifting his head, he saw he was still standing there, looking at him.

“Despite what you think Mr. Winchester, I’m not your fairy Godmother. I can’t grant every wish you make.” Death simply said leaving Dean speechless “I’m afraid you must choose.”

“What?!” Dean and Cas both exclaimed but Death simply smiled and turned his back to them. The two friends looked at each other confused, Dean clenched his jaw and started pacing around thinking. 

“Dean.”

“What Cas? What?” Dean said aggressively. 

“I know what you’re thinking.” Cas answered him not stalling. 

“Oh, no, you don’t. Trust me.” Dean said breathing in and out rubbing his hands on his face.

“You don’t have to do this. We can find another way.” The angel proposed.

“There is no other way” he said pointing every word “Every way leads to me making all the tough choices.”

“Then don’t” Cas whispered taking a step towards Dean “You don’t have to, Dean. You deserve to be saved” he continued looking at the man he would save another thousand times if he had to. 

“And then what, Cas? Let the people die?” he half-choked “That’s not me.”

“Sometimes you have to let yourself go in order to find peace.” Cas said simply. Dean looked at him agape. The words of an angel should be wise, he thought. ‘But who am I to go on despite the rest of the world? I got nothing, I am nothing. I don’t deserve to be saved if half of the planet goes south. No.’ In his mind, Dean had made his decision. He straightened up and walked forward. As if Death had read his mind, he turned around ready to listen.

“So?”

Dean gulped and took a deep breath and said “Kill them”. Cas looked down in defeat while Death nodded.

“Unfortunately for you I won’t do that, but I will locked them back in the Cage.” The reaper promised.

“Whatever suits you best.” Dean said and with the shuffle of wind Death was gone. Dean turned to leave when Cas stopped him “Not a word, Cas. Either you’re in or out.” He said and moved towards his car. He opened the door and got in but Cas didn’t follow.  
He was gone.


	11. Chapter XI

_Yes, there are two paths you can go by,_

_but in the long run_

_There's still time to change the road you're on._

_And it makes me wonder._

_Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know,_

_The piper's calling you to join him_

 

The music filled the air, as Dean drove the Impala to the cemetery of Kansas. He was alone with his thoughts crawling inside his mind and his old tapes. ‘Alone. Again’ he thought. His brother was dead with no hope of turning back and Cas abandoned him with no excuse. He was angry, he was furious. He wanted to punch something. How could he do that? What kind of friend is he? Where was he now that Dean needed him the most? All these questions circled around in Dean’s mind and there was no one to give him answers. He was alone. How could he survive alone?

Maybe Cas was right. Maybe he should have chosen the other option. Maybe if he had removed the Mark instead of trying to be a hero again, Cas would still be here. Maybe…

Dean knew that overthinking wouldn’t lead anywhere. It never did. And as the song said ‘in the long run there's still time to change the road you're on’. After everything ended, he would find Cas, but right now he had to fix what he caused.

* * *

 

“Either you’re in or out.” Dean said and the words hurt like a knife in Cas’s heart. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His best friend was willing, once again, to lay his life down for humanity. Cas didn’t know what hurt the most; the fact that Dean gave up or the fact that Dean didn’t even care about his opinion. He didn’t rebel, he didn’t betray his family, just to watch the man he trusted abandon all hope. He couldn’t witness that, so he left.

He left Dean alone. He knew it was selfish and irrational but he was trying to make Dean understand. He wanted to make a point that once in his long lifetime, saving just one soul it was what really mattered. After all these years, being with Dean, fighting alongside him meant everything to Cas. Dean was his only reality now and he wasn’t ready to give it up. So he flew to the bunker and tried to compose himself, figuring out what to do.

* * *

 

Dean stopped his car outside the cemetery, like he had done one week ago. He took his things and got in where he met Death.

“Where is the angel?” Death said instead of a greeting.

Dean took a deep breath “Don’t mind him” he replied “What are we doing?”

“Well I believe you’ve already done this before” Death answered to Dean’s questioning look “You only need to open the cage with the rings. Leave the rest to me.”

“Not so sure I’m going to do that” Dean said narrowing his eyes.

“Well, let’s say you don’t have any other choice, Mr. Winchester. Trust me.” But Dean wasn’t convinced. “I’m only needed here to summon them. The rest is up to you. If you can manage it all by yourself, of course.” Death said quite ironically.

Dean gave him a sarcastic smile and started to unpack his things “So, what’s the plan?” he asked. “I summon them here, you open the portal and we throw them in. Simple.”

“Okay, let’s do this.” Dean sighed and nodded at the reaper who started mumbling some words in a language Dean never heard of.

In seconds dark clouds gathered in the sky above their heads. In the middle of them a large hole appeared and Michael came from it. At the same time, the earth started shaking and a rumble came from beneath. Dark shadows and red smokes spouted from the ground revealing Lucifer inside Sam’s body.

Dean was watching agape as the two angels glared at Death. “It worked” he mumbled astonished.

“Well, if you could move now, it would be a great idea!” Death ordered Dean who tried to take the rings out of his pocket. But he couldn’t find them. He looked around when he noticed that they had fallen on the ground. He tried to reach them, when he felt someone pushing him away.“You really thought you could trick me?” Michael spoke softly. He shifted his hand and suddenly Dean felt his ribs breaking one after another. He screamed and prayed for the pain to stop.

“Let him go, Angel.” Death yelled and the pain stopped “You will only deal with me.”

“Who do you think you are?’ Lucifer said tilting his head frowning “You are an employee. You work for me.”

“Not anymore.” Death declared and hit his stick on the ground. With a loud noise Lucifer was flung in the air. He felt on the dirt with a shriek but managed to fly again in front of Death hitting him in the face. Meanwhile, Dean got on his knees and was trying to reach the rings, but every attempt caused more pain on his sides and his back. Michael approached him and kicked him at his belly. “You petty men, and your free will.” The archangel said and continued hitting him. “You think you can defeat me, right?” he said viciously and leaned his head in front of Dean’s “Well, I guess you are not so lucky, huh? This world is mine.” He straightened up and lifted his hand. All of a sudden, Dean felt a hand catching him by his throat, strangling him and he was in the air. He couldn’t breathe; he felt his tongue swelling and his eyes were ready to burst out. Second by second he felt himself letting go. With the corner of his eye he could see Death being surrounded by Lucifer’s spells. It was pointless. They were defeated and the world would be destroyed.

“Hey, assbutt!”

“Oh not again!” Michael said and turned around letting Dean fall on the ground in pain. But before he could talk again Cas stabbed him on the chest with the angel blade. Michael screamed and vanished.

Cas rushed to Dean who was covering his eyes from the explosion. “Dean, are you okay?”

“Cas… how-“ but he was too weak to ask questions. They had to put Lucifer in the cage.

“He's not dead. He's just gone for a while.”

“No, Cas the rings- Death” he tried but his friend shushed him. “I got this, Dean. You stay here.” And he left, leaving Dean on the ground.

“Cas-“ Dean mumbled but the pain was tense and his throat was swollen. He stayed there watching the battles scenes happening ten feet away from him. He watched as Cas grabbed the rings and ran towards the spot that Death had told Dean before. He watched as Lucifer stopped kicking Death’s ass and flew towards the angel trying to stop him. He watched Cas falling down and fighting with Satan, and Death standing up only to walk calm towards the fallen angels. He watched as Death finally took hold of the rings and looked at Dean. Dean opened his mouth to say something but no voice came out. Death acted the spell, threw the rings and a hole formed on the graveyard’s ground. Lightning and thunders strike the landscape and smokes came from the hole, meaning that the Cage of Hell was open. But as Cas was fighting with Lucifer, Michael appeared again and caught the angel from his trenchcoat. Together they started beating Cas.

The thought of his friend being hurt made Dean somehow regain his strength but not enough to move. “CAS!” He finally yelled distracting both Michael and Lucifer. Catching a glance from Dean, Cas quickly understood. He turned and kicked Lucifer inside the Cage with force. Immediately, Michael tried to disappear but Death prevented him with a spell. with a blank expression he moved his hand and Michael was gone into the Pit, like his brother. And it was over. Finally, it was over. Dean looked at the sky. At the infinite, big blue sky-

* * *

 

When Dean opened his eyes again, he wasn’t at the Cemetery anymore. He blinked and tried to find his orientation. He tried to stand up but a stich on his side didn't let him. And then he got it. He was in his room in the bunker.

“Dean!”

Dean turned his head to his left and saw Cas sitting up from a chair.

“Cas. H-how did we get here?” he mumbled through his pain.

“I brought us. You blacked out and I had to zap us here. I carried you inside and healed you.”

“Cas, your grace. Are you okay?” he asked concerned.

“Yes, I’m fine, Dean. It doesn’t matter, if it means that you’re okay.” Castiel said smiling and Dean smiled back. But his smile dropped when he remembered that the angel had left him.

“I thought you were gone.”

Castiel looked down and didn’t speak from a minute. “I was. But then I heard you. I heard your prayer, I felt you hurting, I felt you dying. I didn’t know what was happening so I flew to you; to stop the pain.”

“Thank you, Cas.” Dean said sincerely. The angel smiled at the man and stood up “You are tired. Rest now. I will be here tomorrow.” And with that promise he left the room, closing the door behind him. Dean pushed himself inside the bed covers enjoying the soft mattress. He tried to sleep but what Cas said stuck in his mind ‘I will be here tomorrow’. Cas would be here every day now. Always. Cas would be here. Because Cas was everything Dean had now. Everyone else was gone.


	12. Chapter XII

**Year 2115**

One hundred years later the world is not the same. Everything is different. In year 2115 people don’t use cars, they have smart glasses instead of smartphones and robot maids. Bad things -diseases, wars, racism- have been decreased but they still exist because habits may change but the human mind is a very perplexed and dark abyss.

But there is just one thing that remains the same no matter how many centuries pass. At the center of USA, Lebanon, Kansas, there is a hidden door that nobody can see. For the outside world this door means nothing. Just an ordinary wooden door under a power plant building surrounded and covered by plants and ivy. But for one man, this is the most important and powerful place in the entire world.

That man is Dean Winchester.

For the last century, Dean lived inside the bunker with Castiel who never left his side. After the Lucifer lockdown, they rested and mourned Sam. Cas suggested making a somewhat funeral but with who’s body? Dean knew it was pointless and after all he didn’t want to hear all the bittersweet things someone would say to make him feel better. He knew what he needed was a large bottle of alcohol and work to clean his mind.

Oh yes, there was work. He continued to hunt even though Cas had insisted he should not press himself further. He hunts and kills for years and the angel was always there to investigate with him, to fight with him, to patch him up when he would get hurt.

There were days when Dean would go on a case just for the fun of it; just to get out of the bunker, to get the Impala on the road, rolling with the sound of some classic rocks filling the air. Some days that was exactly what Dean needed. That was until he started losing control. Understanding he had enough fun and the only reason he anticipated a case was because he was thinking how to kill the monster; how to kill whoever would stand in his way.

He tried. He tried a lot to suppress these feelings; the will, the longing for murder. Like a strong wind urging him to slice the knife to somebody’s throat. But the Mark was strong. Day by day, month by month, year after year, he felt the Mark sucking every good memory, every happy emotion he’s ever lived. It made him shiver; that poisonous hunger crawling under his skin. There were days when he couldn’t even look at himself in the mirror, afraid he might see a scarlet creepy monster with horns looking back at him. There were days when he couldn’t get out of bed because of all the things he had done affected by the Mark. There were days when he would stand in the shower, absent-mindedly crying, no longer able to live like this.

Today was one of those days. A week after Sam’s birthday, Cas sitting on the map room researching about something Dean couldn’t remember. He couldn’t remember because he was drunk. It was inevitable these days for Dean to get drunk until he passes out. It was the only refugee, the only way to escape for a while. He was so tired. Trying to tame that thing on his arm was exhausting. He kept thinking that it was pointless. There was no reason to live anymore, after all this pain, after all these deaths. Everybody died. ‘Why does everyone have to die and I’m the only one who has to live with this?’ he thought. No, no, that wasn’t fair. All that suffering, it had to end.

“Cas?” Dean mumbled through his glass.

“Dean? Are you okay?” Cas asked worried, while approaching him.

“Am I a good person, Cas?” Dean asked ignoring the concerned look on his friend’s face. Cas sat at chair across from him and looked at him in the eyes.

“Yes, I think you’re a good person.” Cas answered as sincerely as he could.

“How can you say that?” Dean sighed “I’ve killed so many. I’ve done so many terrible things.”

“It wasn’t you, Dean. It’s the Mark.”

“Yes, yes the Mark. Always the Mark.” Dean said quietly. He took a sip of his drink and put the bottle on the table. He felt his nerves twisting and the anger increasing inside him. "That fucking Mark" he hissed and pushed the tale with force causing the bottle to fall and smash into pieces "Fuck!" Dean yelled; Cas didn't react but Dean swore he could hear his heart beating faster now.

"I miss the old me, you know. I can't remember who I was before that stupid Mark." he said and stood up, starting pacing up and down. "M-my dad taught me how to fight monsters; not become one."

Cas stood and walked in front of his friend making him stop pacing. "Listen to me. You are not a monster."

"Shut up, Cas!" Dean cried out "Are you blind? Can't you see I'm dead inside?" he yelled pointing at his chest "There's nothing left! Everything is gone! Everything!"

"I am not!" it was now Cas' turn to yell "I am not gone, Dean! I'm here and alive, in front of you. Why isn't that enough?"

"You know why." Dean answered "You above all people know why. You know what it feels like to watch yourself in the mirror and not recognize your own face. You know what it’s like to feel the evil part of you gaining power and crawling under your skin like an insect. You know. You understand." he said rubbing his face, feeling his cheeks wet from tears he didn't know he shed. Cas tried to approach him and take him into his arms, letting him know he was safe, but Dean pushed him away gently. He went to his room leaving Cas alone and returned holding his blade in his marked hand. "It's buzzing" he let out a sad chuckle "It's like ants climbing up my arms."

Cas felt his breath catch in his throat when he saw the dagger "Dean, please". Dean smiled at him like he was trying to reassure him that everything was alright but Cas didn't want to do anything.

"Ever since that night, the night Sammy died, I feel this empty place in my chest. Like a black hole sucking the life from me and it doesn't go away. It never leaves, Cas. I tried. I swear I did. I resisted as long as I could. But I- I can't do this anymore."

"Dean, don't say that." Cas mumbled with pleading eyes.

Dean closed the gap between them, passing the blade to Cas' hands. "I can't do it by myself. It won't let me; it's too strong."

"W-what... No!" Cas made a step backwards looking scandalized by what Dean asked him to do.

"Cas, please it's got to be you."

"Dean. No! It's going to be alright. Please"

"Damn it, Cas. There is no way anymore! Please!!" Dean sobbed.

"No! I won't do it!!!"

"Why?!"

"Because I love you!" Cas screamed.

Silence fell in the room. The only sound was the rushed panting coming from Castiel. Dean's mouth fell open after that confession and he felt warmth rising in his chest. He approached the angel and held his hands tight. "That's why you have to do it" he said half smiling, half frowning. "After all, you promised."

* * *

 

_Flashback_

Cas was saying something about being extremely old while Dean was chewing his cheeseburger. Life was good  this way; caring about Cas' "family issues", trying to make sense out of a teenage girl. It was one of the times Dean was actually relaxed until Cas asked him if he was okay. He still had nightmares about killing people, him holding the knives, blood everywhere. The Mark was still affecting him even if Sam and Cas had cured him.

"Cas, I need you to promise me something." Dean said putting the burger down.

"Of course." Cas said.

"if I do go dark side, you gotta take me out." Dean demanded seriously.

"What do you mean?"

"Knife me, smite me, burn me in the freaking sun, whatever." Dean asnwered at the questioning look of Cas. "And don't let Sam get in the way because he will."

Cas turned his face away not wanting to aswer. He never believed things would come this way but listening to Dean begging, he could understand. He didn’t want to see his best friend turning dark either.

* * *

 

Cas leaned his head over looking at their entwined hands, without being able to accept what was going to happen. He didn't want to move afraid he would break this moment. He wished the time to stop, to freeze in this exact moment.

"Cas?" Dean broke away stepping back and kneeled in front of the angel "Do you understand?"

Cas tried to answer but no voice came out. He suddenly felt weak without Dean embracing him. He took a better hold of the blade, looked at Dean and nodded.

Dean looked at Cas' hand while he was raising it. He watched as his knuckles whitened by the force he was holding the haft of the blade with. He wondered if the life he'd lived would flash in front of his eyes, but no such thing happened. The only thing he could focus on was that pair of deep blue ocean eyes full of sorrow, knowing he would never see them again. In that moment, he knew that if there was a God, he would thank him for creating these eyes. 'Me too' he thought, but he must have said that out loud because the look on Cas' face changed. A tear rolled down the angel's cheek the exact moment his hand lowered with force.

And that dazzling angelic blue color Dean was seeing made his way to a black abyss.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Destiel it is then! ;) The next chapter would the last! Hope you like it xx


	13. Chapter XIII

Castiel was alone.

This feeling should have been familiar, he thought. That loneliness, that empty feeling, that sorrow. He never really had friends or lovers before so he couldn’t have known about the aching the loss of one would cause to him.

But there's a first time for everything, even for a celestial being. It had been the first time Castiel would meet a human. The first time he would have a friend. The first time he would feel love, compassion, trust. The first time he would do whatever he thought was right. 

And all of that happened after he met that particular human. One person that, in a short amount of time, changed him and saved his life in every possible way, because it was the right one. And now, that person was gone. And Castiel had never thought it would be so painful and heartbreaking. That was one of his firsts too.   
Castiel never really understood why humans when mourning for someone would say "they were my whole life." How can you devote your life to someone as fragile as you? But now, he knew. It was easy for him, quiet. He couldn't find the day or the exact moment it happened, it was just one look and then suddenly he knew. It came like a tidal wave, like an unexpected heat, like a swirling storm. He knew one man was his life. 

But Dean Winchester was dead.

And Cas felt like he was dead quickly after that. Everywhere he went in the bunker, every room, every corner was scarred by Dean's life. Everything was him. But he was nowhere. And that made Cas sad, made him a wreck. He didn't know what to do, how to act. What do you do when the one person, who you abandoned everything else for, no longer exists? He gave up; after a few days, weeks maybe, he gave up. He knew he would never forget. God how could he? Those years were the best he could ever get even if he'd lived for a millennia, and he would forever cherish them. But he needed a distraction. He needed not to be constantly reminded about Dean's absence. So he put on his suit and his trench coat, he locked down the bunker and went to the only place he was sure his mind would drift off; Heaven.

 

* * *

 

Heaven was just as he remembered; shiny and clean, with white walls radiating a bright light. He hated it. He went down that long but familiar aisle and at the end of it there was a huge, heavy, silver door. He opened the gate and took a few confident steps inside.

"At your service." he said to the man sitting in front of him, taking a little bow. Castiel thought those formalities were ridiculous after everything they've been through, but it was customary.

"Castiel, are you sure about this?" Chuck asked.

"You already know that." the angel answered.

Chuck gave him a slight smile "Yes, I do." He said and stood from his throne. He descended the stairs and approached his friend "So, come on then! I have the perfect case for you."

"I'm not interested in any case." Cas declined frowning.

"Then why are you here?" Chuck asked still smiling "I thought you wanted a distraction and I have the best offer." he threw his arm on Cas's shoulder avoiding the awkward look from the Angel's side "My friend, you can't escape your past and the pain in your heart will not be easily forgotten. But in the meantime, you can create space in your mind and soul for more happy memories. That's what I'm trying to provide here. Let me."

Cas looked at him thinking about what he just said. He didn’t think he could ever trust someone after the Winchester brothers, but if he never tried, he would never know. He nodded and suddenly he wasn't at the white hall anymore, but in a western highway road.

* * *

When Dean woke up in his car, he knew something was wrong. He had the same feeling he'd had all those years ago. That pain that rose from his guts, the chill in the back of his neck giving him goosebumps all over his body; those were the symptoms of a place he didn't want to be at.

Instantly he thought of his brother. If he was here then Sam would be here too. He got out of the car and faced the open road. There was nothing but an empty, endless road surrounded by a large, thick forest ahead of him. How could he find Sam out there? He took a deep breath and got into the Impala again. At least the car wasn't changed or damaged, he though and started the engine. He decided to look for Sam, hoping he would be here somewhere.

A lot of time later -could be hours, could be days, Dean didn't really know- he gave up. He drove up the road but there was nothing to be found, not a motel or a diner. He was lost but then again he wasn't. He knew exactly where he was and that everything would be right in front of him if he only wished for it.

And suddenly he got this idea. He opened the glove box and threw out all the garbage there was in there, including old fake IDs and credit cards or classic rock tapes, only to find a picture of him and Sam. It was an old blurry photograph taken two or three years before Sam left them for college. They were sitting side by side on the hood of the Impala laughing because John couldn't press the right buttons. At the memory of that, Dean let out a faint chuckle wishing for things to return to that moment. 

Suddenly he heard someone clearing their throat loudly from the back seat. He turned his head so fast he heard a crack "Sam?"

"I remember that photograph. It was one of the few moment dad got his ass out of searching and actually enjoyed his time with us."

"You know he was trying his best."

"No he wasn't." Sam said giving his brother a sad smile "How did you get here, Dean?"

"Well, I think there's only one way to get here" Dean stated the obvious receiving a bitchy look from his brother. Looking at him was surreal to say the least. Sam was still young with the same long hair and bright face, like he was deaged somehow, but  still got that serious look on his face.

"Dean, tell me you didn't die just to find me. Tell me you didn't waste your chance."

Dean didn't answer. He looked down and got out on the road gesturing for Sam to do the same so they could talk properly.

"Dean-"

"Sam, it's okay." he cleared his throat awkwardly "Uh, after y-you died, things didn't go so good. Not as we expected."

"I know." Sam told him with a reassuring smile.

"Oh, you do?"

"Yes, everyone up here knows."

"Mhm. Why doesn't that surprise me?" Dean joked and Sam chuckled. It was nice, like they were on some case again, laughing about the obnoxious wife of the victim or about a silly joke Dean would make. Dean knew they couldn't be like that anymore, but right now he was just happy that he was with his brother again. "So..."

"I will answer every question, Dean, but first we need to go upstairs."

"Dude, what? Are you an angel now or something?" he frowned.

Sam laughed but didn't answered the question "Come on, let's go."

* * *

 

They went to Heaven "headquarters" to be given instructions of what to do next. They could live however they wanted now. It was something like "dead's privileges" as Dean liked to call them. They could live in a total fantasy and the brothers chose to stick together because that was what they're good at. They drove and roamed around forests, cities and towns looking like the Mid-west States. Dean could eat a million burgers and would still have space for more, and Sam could get a hundred dogs to pet, but all that really mattered was that they had each other. That was the life in Heaven. No more angels and demons, no more wars, no more deaths. No more unexpected surprising events.   
Until one day.

Dean was driving an open road per usual. The Impala grooving through the summer breeze, one of the old tapes blaring inside the car and Sam on shotgun with his nose stuck into some nerdy book.  There was nothing left behind them, nothing ahead. When suddenly a figure appeared not thirty feet in front of them. Dean pushed the brakes as fast and hard as he could, one hand on the wheel and the other tight against Sam's body, subconsciously protecting him from going through the window. He closed his eyes preparing for an impact but the car stopped before anything happened.

"Castiel?" Dean heard Sam saying and he opened his eyes right away. The bright light from the sun blinded him for a moment, so he blinked to look better. In front of the car, not even two feet away was standing the man with the trench coat. Quickly, Dean got out of the car, not bothering to kill the engine or close the door behind him.

"Dean -" the angel tried to say with a hoarse voice but Dean didn't let him. He closed his arms around him, hugging him tight, never wanting to let him go. Cas was here. Or was he? Suddenly fear crawled inside him.

Was Heaven playing some kind of a game with him? He unhooked himself from Castiel and grabbed him from the shoulders.

"Cas, are you real?" he asked. The angel didn't answer, just looked at Dean. And then into those shining blue eyes Dean caught a glimpse of happiness and hope. Cas was happy to see him. Cas was real. This moment was real. Dean loosened up his grip and moved his hands up and cupped the angel's cheeks.   
"You're really here." he said smiling.

"I could never leave you." Cas answered.

"Cas, I'm sorry I-"

But he never finished. Cas' lips crashed into his in a rushed, sloppy kiss. It wasn't perfect or  anything like the kisses they talked about in movies. There were no fireworks or butterflies in the stomach. It was just an affirmation of everything they wanted, everything they felt all those years. Just those well-known three little words in action. They stopped to catch their breath and locked their gazes, silently promising to never leave each other alone ever again. They moved towards the car, watching as Sam was grinning brightly at them making Cas blush slightly.

Dean sat on the driver's sit and looked at Cas through the rearview mirror, flashing him a smile. The angel smiled back and quickly started a conversation with the younger Winchester brother about the book he was reading. Dean sighed at those geeks, turned on the music and turned back to the road ahead.  
While driving, Dean's mind wondered on how this is what he always wanted. Some people wanted a warm house with children and lots of friends, but for Dean it was always the life on the road.

The lyric "There'll be peace when you are done" blasted through the stereo and Dean understood he had finally found his paradise. He had a car to call home and just two faces to call family.

_**THE END** _

 

**Author's Note:**

> You can find us on our tumblr theabyssgame.tumblr.com  
> kudos and comments are welcome xx


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